Here are four bears, each splendid in their own way. These bears as tattered and worn, continue to be loved and cherished. Understanding their stories will help explain why such a love connection developed over the years and continues to exist and hold strong.
How did it all start? That’s simple. The bears were gifts, given out of love. Each one accepted with excitement and joy.
The four bears continue to celebrate life’s experiences, including birthdays, car rides, eating at restaurants, movies, celebrating holidays, sleepovers, hospital stays and vacations in different states and countries. These bears know and understand hurt, sorrow, love, joy, anger, happiness, regret, fear, hopelessness, gratitude and excitement.
Along with the fun and laughter, the bears also endure the pain and tribulations of life. After all this time, the bears know more about tears and the sharp pain that sometimes resonates and racks their loved one’s bodies more than anyone else. The love connection is so strong. Each of these bear’s can soothe and continue to provide comfort quietly, just by being present. So simple.
How do they soothe? They love without judgement and cuddle without objection. A simple rub against a face, a smothering hug or a rigid grasp each provide a tranquilizing effect. Each of these bears are loved. The bears are priceless and non-replaceable.
Courage and Comfort
The first Pooh on the left is and has been a companion of my younger girl, for a little over 10 years. My daughter was about 3 years old when Pooh came into her life. Pooh became one of her stuffed friends. Over time, he stole her heart. This tiny girl began to hold her Pooh by his neck and take him everywhere; the reason for his now limp neck. Pooh bear continues to provide my daughter with more comfort and courage than I could have thought possible.
The most profound memory of Pooh alleviating Rayna’s pain and discomfort was when she had heart surgery at age five. Following the surgery she had a difficult time. She woke up, threw up blood, cried and went back to sleep. The second time, she woke, she threw up blood, looked at it and and then began to cry again. This time though, she apologized for throwing up and making a mess and then said, if I could only have Pooh Bear, I’ll be better. This poor little suffering child just needed her Pooh Bear for comfort, not us, just her Pooh Bear.
We were allowed to give our daughter her Pooh Bear. She grabbed him by his neck, smiled and went right back to sleep in peace. She clung to her Pooh Bear. Pooh Bear had quite the hospital stay. He was thrown up on, washed and was back to provide comfort. In the days that followed, when a blood pressure cuff was placed on her arm, the nurse also provided one on Pooh Bear. Pooh also had his own mask.
I could never have imagined one stuffed animal providing such comfort. I look at Pooh Bear and I’m so grateful that this bear is and has been part of our family.
Companionship and Love
Pooh Bear on the right, has been my older daughter’s companion and soother for almost 15 years. This Pooh Bear was a replacement for another Pooh Bear. I wanted my husband to buy 2 replacement Pooh Bears that were the same so if something happened to one, we had the other. I saw how distraught our daughter was when she had to give her one Pooh Bear up so we could wash him when he was thrown up on. We couldn’t find another Pooh Bear like the one she had so I thought two new Pooh Bears could solve the problem. Well it didn’t work out as I had planned.
My husband, took my daughter to the store on their quest and came home with this Pooh Bear that played music. This was the last bear and our daughter fell in love with him. We basically were in the same boat that we were in when we started. We had a one of a kind Pooh Bear.
My husband soon found out what having a one of a kind bear meant. My husband and daughter brought Pooh Bear everywhere they went, to the park, shopping and on any other errands. One day this included a visit to a new garage to have the car fixed. They waited and then came home, our daughter had fallen asleep during the errand and was still asleep when they arrived home.
Unbeknownst to my husband, Pooh Bear did not make it home with them. When our daughter woke, the search for Pooh Bear was on. My husband retraced their steps and realized, in all likelihood, the bear had to be at the garage. He drove back and standing their he found this huge guy that must have lifted weights decorated with multiple tattoos holding up Pooh Bear. He asked my husband, did you forget your bear? All laughing aside, the seriousness of separation from our daughter’s Pooh Bear was now known.
Our older daughter has slept with her Pooh Bear for years, when she is over tired or upset, you can still see her take Pooh Bear and rub his nose on her face. Pooh’s eyes and nose have been stitched up many times. We will keep on patching him up as best we can.
Injured Bear
The injured bear with the broken arm was given to my mother after a car accident. I would never have thought about sending her flowers with a stuffed animal; that just wasn’t my mother. Her having time for a stuffed animal; ridiculous.
Well my cousins knew better than I. For whatever reason, at age 70, she found comfort in this little bear. Was it that my dad had passed on by this time and this little stuffed animal provided her with this symbol of love that she could keep around her? I just don’t know for sure, but I do know this, the little bear was close to her heart. She would actually speak to me about this little stuffed animal when she called. This was so odd to me to witness. When she knew she was dying, she said I could take her bear. So I guess the relevance or comfort a bear can give transcends one’s age.
Musical Bear
The last bear is small and scrawny but just as endearing. I can’t say that I remember who gave me the bear or when, nor can I say that I slept with this bear for comfort. I do know though that this bear played music and moved it’s neck. Whenever I was upset, off my bookshelf this bear would come. I would sit and wind it up over and over, and wait until I felt better.
When I moved out of my parent’s house, this bear came with me and was placed in a drawer. Again, after I married and moved, this bear came along. I take the bear out every once in awhile to show my girls and I smile at this tiny bear that gave me comfort.
Each of these bears hold their own magic. They help calm and assuage the aching hearts of others. The bears are not new and fluffy but instead, worn and weathered.
How is possible that a stuffed animal can provide solace, or be the healing balm for a child or adult? Do stuffed animals have such power?
According to psychoanalysts, psychologists, psychiatrists and therapists, objects just like these wonderful teddy bears help us with our emotional well-being and development. I no longer complain about the stuffed animals that continue to come into our home.
D.W. Winnicott, a pediatrician and psychoanalyst, first spoke about the special value of these transitional objects in 1951. D.W. Winnicott explained that these objects help the child move from the oral relationship with their mothers to genuine object relationships.
Developmental psychologist, Robert Kegan indicated, objects like stuffed animals, are important for human development. Colleen Goddard, a Child Development Specialist, stated, “The object allows for and invites emotional well-being, and without such an object, true feelings may be concealed, suppressed, or dismissed as the infant/child has no other means by which to cope with, comprehend, and contend with the world.”
Corrine Sweet, psychologist tells us cuddling a teddy bears “…evokes a sense of peace, security and comfort. It’s human nature to crave these feelings from childhood to adult life” (Llorens, 2012).” In addition, studies show, “touching a teddy bear can lessen the adverse psychological effects of social exclusion and reduce stress (Jarrett, 2011)”.
Fun Fact
The Teddy Bear is named after President Theodore Roosevelt. In November 1902, during a Mississippi hunting trip, President Roosevelt refused to kill a bear that had been clubbed by hunting guides and tied to a tree. President Roosevelt told his guides that “it would be unsportsmanlike to kill a defenseless animal that way.”
Clifford Berryman, a political cartoon artist, drew a newspaper cartoon, “Drawing the Line in Mississippi” to reference the refusal to shoot the bear but also to illustrate the boundary dispute between Mississippi and Louisiana. Well that image of the bear inspired a shopkeeper.
A, Brooklyn, New York, shopkeeper Morris Michtom and his wife Rose, made a stuffed fabric bear in honor of the President and displayed it with a sign, “Teddy’s bear,” in their store window. Customers were interested in purchasing the bear. Morris and Rose Michtom requested permission to use his name for their stuffed toy which was granted. This started Michtom’s company that manufactured teddy bears and other toys.
So for over 100 years, teddy bears have been gracing our homes and providing love and comfort to generations. Never under estimate the power and significance of the tattered worn out bears you see adorning a book shelf or stuffed into a closet. They give comfort and joy just as they are in their current state.
Remember, they are also contributing to our well-being. So, enjoy the bear, stuffed animal, blanket or other significant object that you hold close to your heart.
For Additional Details Read…
More Than Just Teddy Bears – by Colleen Goddard, Child Development Specialist – Posted July 15, 2014
Our Love Affair with Teddy Bears – by Claire Harris
Loveys, Stuffed Animals, and Pets – Understanding Transitional Objects – by Paul C. Hollinger – Psychiatrist and Psychoanalyst – January 5, 2017
Who Invented the Teddy Bear? – by Elizabeth Nix – Posted January 14, 2020
I really enjoyed reading the story of this sweet collection of bears and what each signified for you and your family members, particularly what you learned about your daughters, your mother and yourself through your “friendships”
with these stuffed animals. I also had (and still have!) a special teddy bear, Ted, who – like your daughter’s bear – had a solo adventure when I forgot him in a restaurant as a three year old. (According to family lore, Ted was nursing a beer at the bar when my father came to retrieve him – between you and me, I don’t buy that!)
It’s fascinating to see these personal stories in connection to research about treasured stuffed animals and their beneficial effects on emotional well-being – I had no idea this was something research supported! I’ll have to check out the links you provided – this is a truly uplifting “tiny tidbit of life”!
I’m so happy you enjoyed this posting. It was fun writing it and finding related information. Come back for more!!