“Look, Tattered Bears Or A Love Connection That Can’t Be Severed?”

-Posted September September 8, 2020

Here are four bears, each splendid in their own way. These bears as tattered and worn, continue to be loved and cherished. Understanding their stories will help explain why such a love connection developed over the years and continues to exist and hold strong.

How did it all start? That’s simple. The bears were gifts, given out of love. Each one accepted with excitement and joy.

The four bears continue to celebrate life’s experiences, including birthdays, car rides, eating at restaurants, movies, celebrating holidays, sleepovers, hospital stays and vacations in different states and countries. These bears know and understand hurt, sorrow, love, joy, anger, happiness, regret, fear, hopelessness, gratitude and excitement.

Along with the fun and laughter, the bears also endure the pain and tribulations of life. After all this time, the bears know more about tears and the sharp pain that sometimes resonates and racks their loved one’s bodies more than anyone else. The love connection is so strong. Each of these bear’s can soothe and continue to provide comfort quietly, just by being present. So simple.

How do they soothe? They love without judgement and cuddle without objection. A simple rub against a face, a smothering hug or a rigid grasp each provide a tranquilizing effect. Each of these bears are loved. The bears are priceless and non-replaceable.

Courage and Comfort

The first Pooh on the left is and has been a companion of my younger girl, for a little over 10 years. My daughter was about 3 years old when Pooh came into her life. Pooh became one of her stuffed friends. Over time, he stole her heart. This tiny girl began to hold her Pooh by his neck and take him everywhere; the reason for his now limp neck. Pooh bear continues to provide my daughter with more comfort and courage than I could have thought possible.

The most profound memory of Pooh alleviating Rayna’s pain and discomfort was when she had heart surgery at age five. Following the surgery she had a difficult time. She woke up, threw up blood, cried and went back to sleep. The second time, she woke, she threw up blood, looked at it and and then began to cry again. This time though, she apologized for throwing up and making a mess and then said, if I could only have Pooh Bear, I’ll be better. This poor little suffering child just needed her Pooh Bear for comfort, not us, just her Pooh Bear.

We were allowed to give our daughter her Pooh Bear. She grabbed him by his neck, smiled and went right back to sleep in peace. She clung to her Pooh Bear. Pooh Bear had quite the hospital stay. He was thrown up on, washed and was back to provide comfort. In the days that followed, when a blood pressure cuff was placed on her arm, the nurse also provided one on Pooh Bear. Pooh also had his own mask.

I could never have imagined one stuffed animal providing such comfort. I look at Pooh Bear and I’m so grateful that this bear is and has been part of our family.

Companionship and Love

Pooh Bear on the right, has been my older daughter’s companion and soother for almost 15 years. This Pooh Bear was a replacement for another Pooh Bear. I wanted my husband to buy 2 replacement Pooh Bears that were the same so if something happened to one, we had the other. I saw how distraught our daughter was when she had to give her one Pooh Bear up so we could wash him when he was thrown up on. We couldn’t find another Pooh Bear like the one she had so I thought two new Pooh Bears could solve the problem. Well it didn’t work out as I had planned.

My husband, took my daughter to the store on their quest and came home with this Pooh Bear that played music. This was the last bear and our daughter fell in love with him. We basically were in the same boat that we were in when we started. We had a one of a kind Pooh Bear.

My husband soon found out what having a one of a kind bear meant. My husband and daughter brought Pooh Bear everywhere they went, to the park, shopping and on any other errands. One day this included a visit to a new garage to have the car fixed. They waited and then came home, our daughter had fallen asleep during the errand and was still asleep when they arrived home.

Unbeknownst to my husband, Pooh Bear did not make it home with them. When our daughter woke, the search for Pooh Bear was on. My husband retraced their steps and realized, in all likelihood, the bear had to be at the garage. He drove back and standing their he found this huge guy that must have lifted weights decorated with multiple tattoos holding up Pooh Bear. He asked my husband, did you forget your bear? All laughing aside, the seriousness of separation from our daughter’s Pooh Bear was now known.

Our older daughter has slept with her Pooh Bear for years, when she is over tired or upset, you can still see her take Pooh Bear and rub his nose on her face. Pooh’s eyes and nose have been stitched up many times. We will keep on patching him up as best we can.

Injured Bear

The injured bear with the broken arm was given to my mother after a car accident. I would never have thought about sending her flowers with a stuffed animal; that just wasn’t my mother. Her having time for a stuffed animal; ridiculous.

Well my cousins knew better than I. For whatever reason, at age 70, she found comfort in this little bear. Was it that my dad had passed on by this time and this little stuffed animal provided her with this symbol of love that she could keep around her? I just don’t know for sure, but I do know this, the little bear was close to her heart. She would actually speak to me about this little stuffed animal when she called. This was so odd to me to witness. When she knew she was dying, she said I could take her bear. So I guess the relevance or comfort a bear can give transcends one’s age.

Musical Bear

The last bear is small and scrawny but just as endearing. I can’t say that I remember who gave me the bear or when, nor can I say that I slept with this bear for comfort. I do know though that this bear played music and moved it’s neck. Whenever I was upset, off my bookshelf this bear would come. I would sit and wind it up over and over, and wait until I felt better.

When I moved out of my parent’s house, this bear came with me and was placed in a drawer. Again, after I married and moved, this bear came along. I take the bear out every once in awhile to show my girls and I smile at this tiny bear that gave me comfort.

Each of these bears hold their own magic. They help calm and assuage the aching hearts of others. The bears are not new and fluffy but instead, worn and weathered.

How is possible that a stuffed animal can provide solace, or be the healing balm for a child or adult? Do stuffed animals have such power?

According to psychoanalysts, psychologists, psychiatrists and therapists, objects just like these wonderful teddy bears help us with our emotional well-being and development. I no longer complain about the stuffed animals that continue to come into our home.

D.W. Winnicott, a pediatrician and psychoanalyst, first spoke about the special value of these transitional objects in 1951. D.W. Winnicott explained that these objects help the child move from the oral relationship with their mothers to genuine object relationships.

Developmental psychologist, Robert Kegan indicated, objects like stuffed animals, are important for human development. Colleen Goddard, a Child Development Specialist, stated, “The object allows for and invites emotional well-being, and without such an object, true feelings may be concealed, suppressed, or dismissed as the infant/child has no other means by which to cope with, comprehend, and contend with the world.”

Corrine Sweet, psychologist tells us cuddling a teddy bears “…evokes a sense of peace, security and comfort. It’s human nature to crave these feelings from childhood to adult life” (Llorens, 2012).” In addition, studies show, “touching a teddy bear can lessen the adverse psychological effects of social exclusion and reduce stress (Jarrett, 2011)”.  

Fun Fact

The Teddy Bear is named after President Theodore Roosevelt. In November 1902, during a Mississippi hunting trip, President Roosevelt refused to kill a bear that had been clubbed by hunting guides and tied to a tree. President Roosevelt told his guides that “it would be unsportsmanlike to kill a defenseless animal that way.” 

Clifford Berryman, a political cartoon artist, drew a newspaper cartoon, “Drawing the Line in Mississippi” to reference the refusal to shoot the bear but also to illustrate the boundary dispute between Mississippi and Louisiana. Well that image of the bear inspired a shopkeeper.

A, Brooklyn, New York, shopkeeper Morris Michtom and his wife Rose, made a stuffed fabric bear in honor of the President and displayed it with a sign, “Teddy’s bear,” in their store window. Customers were interested in purchasing the bear. Morris and Rose Michtom requested permission to use his name for their stuffed toy which was granted. This started Michtom’s company that manufactured teddy bears and other toys.

So for over 100 years, teddy bears have been gracing our homes and providing love and comfort to generations. Never under estimate the power and significance of the tattered worn out bears you see adorning a book shelf or stuffed into a closet. They give comfort and joy just as they are in their current state.

Remember, they are also contributing to our well-being. So, enjoy the bear, stuffed animal, blanket or other significant object that you hold close to your heart.

For Additional Details Read…

More Than Just Teddy Bears – by Colleen Goddard, Child Development Specialist – Posted July 15, 2014

Our Love Affair with Teddy Bears – by Claire Harris

Loveys, Stuffed Animals, and Pets – Understanding Transitional Objects – by Paul C. Hollinger – Psychiatrist and Psychoanalyst – January 5, 2017

Who Invented the Teddy Bear? – by Elizabeth Nix – Posted January 14, 2020

Coincidence or Divine Intervention? Tell Me What You Think.

– Posted August 29, 2020

Throughout our lives, we have occurrences or experiences that stay with us because of their impact, whether on an emotional or physical level. The occurrence or experience seems to shape us or cause our direction in life to change in some way. We find these experiences to be momentous or maybe soothing or moving. So, we cling and every so often reflect on these experiences of coincidence or divine intervention.

If I broaden my view, I be need to consider the wisdom within, The Secret by Rhonda Byrne’s. The book explains how thoughts and the law of attraction come together to make things happen. If we change our thoughts, believe and live as though we have the things we want, this positivity will cause the universe to align and make this happen.

“Coincidences are not accidents but signals from the universe which can guide us toward our true destiny.” – Deepak Chopra

For me, I deem the origin of the experiences I’m about to share, to be divine in nature. I don’t feel they are coincidences. If you ask my girls whether these experiences are coincidences or caused by divine intervention, my younger daughter would say, coincidences. My older daughter, being a little bit older and having experienced more of life, is more reflective, she would say, there’s something special about the experiences. She is not ready to say it’s divine in nature or just life.

Divine Intervention

Before we move forward, let’s define and interpret ‘divine intervention‘ so we’re on the same page. I think it’s fair to say, this is when a diety gets involved with human happenings.

So what does this really mean. For me, I believe divine intervention can be a strong inner feeling, calling, yearning or occurrence that can’t be explained by what’s taking place at a point in time. Or hearing a voice within your being, leading you in a direction.

Coincidence

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionay, a coincidence is “the occurrence of events that happen at the same time by accident but seem to have some connection.”

In an article, Are Coincidences Signs from God?, Sharon Hewlitt Rawlett indicates, ‘A 2009 survey of people affiliated with the University of Missouri-Columbia found that “the most strongly endorsed explanations for coincidences were God and fate” (Coleman, Beitman, & Celebi 2009: 269).’

To complicate things further, from the quote above, it seems some also interchange coincidences, divine intervention and destiny. Read the articles by Sonya Downing and Stephanie Englehart to learn more.

Is God always there guiding our lives so divine intervention is nothing other than normal course? Okay, different points of view. You as the reader, must decide for yourself. Look at your experiences and see what you think.

I’m including some experiences we can look at and evaluate. You see where you land with each of these. I can’t logically fit these occurrences in the category of coincidences. My litmus test is to first see if the experience was random or moving. If the experience was random and really caused no emotional tug at the heart, I consider this more of a coincidence. If the experience was emotional and in the end provided comfort, to me this is of a divine nature. An experience, like a healing balm, that allows us to move forward toward change, closure or renewal is divine intervention.

An Eagle Brings a Message

After my dad had a stroke, a cousin called. She wanted to know what happened to my father. We still hadn’t called to tell our family about his stroke. My cousin explained, while fishing with her sister, an eagle flew overhead and started circling their boat. They moved the boat and the eagle followed and continued to circle above them. My younger cousin told her sister, something happened to Uncle Johnny. Her sister didn’t understand. My younger cousin elaborated and said, it’s the eagle, it’s his message, we need to go home now.

Our priest explained to us, John the Evangelist symbolizes the eagle. My father’s name was John. Was he getting the message out to the family through God? The priest also said, the signs are there for those who are willing to see them.

A Kiss Good-bye

My 8 year old niece, was with her other grandfather when we called and said my father passed away. He began explaining what happened to her Papa John. My niece said, I already know, he kissed me on the cheek good-bye.

A Message of Hope

Adopting our second child was a long journey riddled with so many emotional ups and downs. The process to bring our younger child home from start to finish was three years and seven months.

You couldn’t imagine our joy when after three years and two months of waiting, we had our daughter’s picture in hand. We were going to China. Within a month, all of the last required documents were in place. We were set, we just need approval from China to travel. We were so elated and antsy , we could’ve jumped our of our skin.

March passed with no news. Thankfully in April, we contacted a store in China that could visit the orphanage and bring gifts. We sent treats, clothes, toys to be shared and an album with some pictures of us and her home specifically for our daughter. The woman from the store surprised us on Easter morning, with pictures of our daughter. It was truly a gift from God. We were ecstatic. This kept us going.

May passed and other people with the same paperwork dates traveled to China. Our agency couldn’t explain why our approval to travel hadn’t come. By the end of June our spirits plummeted. We made calls to our agency trying to find out the problem. We felt something had gone so wrong.

The Rainbabies

Life continued as we moved into July. I pulled out a picture book we recently purchased, The Rainbabies by Laura Kraus Melmed and read it to my older daughter. It was about a couple that had been blessed with comforts, but not with a baby to love and call their own.

One night the luck of the Moonshowers brought them 12 rainbabies to love. Not too long after, a man came to their door. He was a messenger sent by a woman of wealth. The messenger offered the couple wealth, a moonstone, in exchange for the rainbabies. The couple refused.

The messenger took the moonstone and placed it around his neck. At this point, the messenger transforms into Mother Moonshower.

Mother Moonshower thanks the couple for protecting her children from dangers born of water, fire and earth. The couple proved themselves to be worthy parents, but the rainbabies could only grow properly with Mother Moonshower’s help. As a gift she gave the couple a baby girl with hair like the midnight sky, Rayna.

I lost it; I could not stop crying. In our paperwork, we named our daughter Rayna. I knew the message was clear, God was going to move mountains so we could bring our Rayna home. There was no longer doubt about the success of this adoption.

A week later, we received a call at midnight from our agency. Our agency reached out to the Chinese Ministry and received our permission to go to China. Two weeks later we were in China picking up our daughter, Rayna.

I feel God provided the hope and inner strength, I so needed, but could no longer muster. After this experience, I knew with all my heart that we were bringing Rayna home from China.

Coincidence or Divine Convention?

Coincidence, divine intervention or the law of attraction, you decide. For me, I was at a low point and had lost hope that the adoption would take place. My resolve dwindled with each passing day. I believe God interceded and set events in motion, from including The Rainbabies in the pile of books ordered, to my selection to read it that day when I was at a low point.

Maybe some would say the ordering of this particular book, and decision to read it at this particular time was a coincidence. I believe this was divine intervention. The story, the daughter’s name being Rayna, it felt like more than a coincidence. It was as though God was speaking directly to me. He let me know he was going to make this happen.

We had picked the name, Rayna because the name meant, “Song of the Lord.” My husband and I had said, if this adoption was going to happen, it was God who was going to make it happen. We felt it was a perfect name. And in the end, he sent us a message and blessed us with Rayna.

We each have to listen to facts and decide what’s logical and what feels like our truth. Then we have the facts to make decisions as to what we want to believe. I believe in divine intervention.

Sonya Downing’s brother would disagree with my view. He would say, God is always working around us and making things happen. So it was divine but not divine intervention.

Deepak Chopra thinks coincidences are signals from the universe. Does Deepak agree with the law of attraction? Were these experiences moving me toward my destiny?

I just think each of these experiences were divine. I also believe, God intervened and shared his plan. He touched my cousin’s heart, my niece’s heart and my heart with his message. My cousin knew a message about my father was being passed to her. My niece knew her Papa John had to leave her, but not before saying good-bye with a kiss. I knew Rayna was coming home. He gave us the healing balm we needed to accept and move forward.

Grace helps us understand the mysteries within the church. Maybe for my cousin, niece and myself, grace provided us the faith needed so we could witness his acts of divine intervention.

I would love to hear your stories and let me know what you think. Are these examples of coincidence, divine intervention or the law of attraction? Send some of your own examples. I would love to hear them.

Read More About Coincidences, Divine Intervention and The Secret

Sonya Downing, Christianity.com Contributing Writer, What is Divine Intervention? – May 12, 2020

Stephanie Englehart, BibleStudyTools.com, Does God Work through Divine Intervention? – Tuesday, August 11, 2020

Rhonda Byrne, The Secret Book Summary, Shortform.com

Sharon Hewit Rawlette, Ph.D, PsychologyToday.com, Are Coincidences Signs From God? – February 5, 2020

Inconsequential Yet Monumental Emotionally

-Posted July 11, 2020

What do you think of this plant? Your reaction may be to say something like, it’s nice, it’s a plant or it’s odd with the stem sticking out. Some may even say, why are you wasting my time writing about this plant. Funny, on other days, I may have had the same reactions or thoughts.

Well, let me tell you about this plant. Last week while returning a purchase to Home Depot with my husband, I came across this plant. I was immediately drawn to it. I though, passed it by because I know priorities and this plant was not one of them. While in queue, the plant was still on my mind. I had to go look at it again.

I looked at each of the plants and I especially took notice of those with the stem growing from the middle. The changing feelings and emotions welled within me. I had to take this plant home. I had to have it. It didn’t matter that I certainly didn’t need another plant, or that this was not what I walked out the door to buy. It may have been a silly frivolous purchase but to me the dollar value could not be assigned.

Why all the fuss, the emotion? Well for me, this plant took me back to another time. I had a plant just like this one. It was among a group of plants, but this plant was by far the smallest, the size of my thumb. This little plant out of all the others, just kept surviving; so small yet it held on and grew. It doubled in size and then it doubled in size again. Then to my surprise, a stem grew out of the top of the plant.

I called my dad to let him know that this special little plant had another plant growing from a stem that grew from its middle. I was absolutely thrilled. Of course my dad knew all about my plants so he too shared my excitement.

You see at that time, I was on my own and I loved growing plants. I had a window filled with plants and then over time, my living room became a hot house. The lighting was perfect for growing plants. I would spend hours caring for them and re-potting them when needed. I began to give away plants just to bring some smiles.

This particular plant was one of my favorites because it was a survivor. I could separate the plant at the bottom; additional plants would grow out from the sides of the plant and each time a stem grew, another one or two baby plants grew from the top. I actually visited as many garage sales and flea markets as I could in search of pretty pots. My aunt visited garage sales and flea markets by her home and gave me the pots she collected.

Soon my friends, family and colleagues had plants from me. I then branched out. When consultants came to work on projects with my team, I gave them plants. I gave anyone that mentioned they like plants, one of their own. Hours upon hours of joy were spent with these plants.

When I married, my parents helped us move; they took the plants with them. My father loved all the plants,. Since our townhouse didn’t have the room or the lighting for all the plants, my dad kept them. Then sadness struck, he passed on. Either to rid herself of the hurt or just not wanting to spend the time, my mom threw all the plants away.

When I visited, I saw the plants were no longer in their spots by the windows. It was a rough time, my father-in-law was dying of cancer at the same time. My father being gone, the plants being gone and the pending death of my father-in-law took something out of me.

What more could be asked then, how could you throw all the plants away? My mom was suffering and trying to move on in her own way. We each cope with loss and change differently. She did what she felt she needed to do.

I moved on. My husband became the one with the green thumb and his gardening has always surrounded us with the beauty of growth and new life. Our neighbors and strangers look at the gardening and compliment him on his plants and landscaping. It is a labor of love as my plants were my labor of love.

Last week, I was given a gift. When I saw and bought this plant, a part of me that I left behind so long ago, started to grow from within. All the happiness and love from the plants felt so long ago, started to peek out from deep within my soul. I can’t express in words the emotions and feelings this little plant brings forth from my heart. Maybe an inconsequential plant to some, but a treasure, a blessing and hope for me.

I guess in life we all have small inconsequential things that spark so much emotion within us. I wish each of you the joy of bringing that inconsequential thing to the surface for you to enjoy and savor.

“It is the small things in life which count; it is the inconsequential leak which empties the biggest reservoir.” – Charles Comiskey

Life

A Very Special Day

– Posted July 26, 2020

“Shine your soul with the same egoless humility as the rainbow and no matter where you go in the world or the next, love will find you, attend you, and bless you.” – Aberjhani, Journey through the Power of the Rainbow: Quotations from a Life Made Out of Poetry

This week we were blessed. We celebrated my younger daughter’s 10th Gotcha Day. What’s a Gotcha Day? It’s the anniversary of the day on which a child joins a family by adoption. This date may differ from the actual adoption day.

For us, our younger daughter’s Gotcha Day ended a three and a half year journey. It was the culmination of years of prayer, hope, excitement, wonder, sadness, stress, and delays. You can describe it, maybe, as a bitter-sweet experience. For us, God set our path and we knew love was our guide no matter what obstacle came our way. And the obstacles were many, but so were the amazing blessings.

We celebrate our daughter’s life, the miracle of her existence and ongoing growth. We thank God for his wondrous plan and for all those he placed in our path to make this miracle come to fruition.

What did we find when we arrived at the Adoption Center ten years ago? A child held in God’s palm. A beautiful nineteen pound little girl, then two years and seven months old. She was initially inconsolable, hoarse from crying and exhausted from her ordeal of riding three hours in a van to the city.

We were finally able to calm her a bit when a water stick with a ball that floated back and forth caught her eye. We had our opening, you could see it in her eyes; they danced and lit up. What was this thing? How did the ball go back and forth? The wonder of this object broke her misery.

We quickly began sharing other things that intrigued her; a recorder that played Winnie the Pooh songs, a small board book, her own Winnie the Pooh. Relief, we could all breathe and relax. Our older daughter, five at the time, came out from hiding behind us, her place of retreat when the crying didn’t stop. Our family unit was now in tune with one another.

Once back at the hotel, we found she would not fit in any of the 2 – 3 year old toddler clothing we brought. She was still in 6-9 month old clothing, could not eat solid food, wasn’t able to speak and could only stand and walk a few steps before going back to crawling. Every change in her environment brought on another bout of uncontrollable crying.

What else? She was and still is a miracle, a ray of sunshine with a smile that could and still can light up a room. Her eyes danced and continue to dance with love and laughter. She was and is a joy.

We also celebrate the memories of those we met along the way and the friendships that have continued over time. Poy, a lovely young girl working at the hotel on the courtesy floor was our light. She was so kind always ready to help with directions, email access, snacks for the girls and anything else we needed. Poy was also such a source of encouragement and support. Just her smile greeting us as we walked in, lifted all our spirits. God sent us a guardian angel to help us along the way.

Funny, the girls still have the crown tiara she bought for our younger daughter and markers for drawing for our older daughter. Over the years, she has sent them a blow up pool and wishes for their 100 Good Wishes Albums. Isn’t it amazing? A chance meeting touched us forever.

We also think about our adoption guide, David. Once we found our little one couldn’t eat solids and wouldn’t drink milk or formula, he immediately picked up a special tea for children packed with vitamins. He helped us figure out dishes we could order for our daughter that she could eat like, steamed eggs with soy sauce, soup, and Congee.

We give thanks for our friends that watched our home and decorated for our return. It was a beautiful surprise that will always be remembered. The girls had gift baskets and decorated rooms and we had a refrigerator filled with fresh food. For a travel wearied family, this was our nirvana.

One of our younger daughter’s names is Jing, meaning crystal. The Chinese characters for crystal are three suns. We gave our daughter this name because she sparkles like a crystal. God has granted us a gift that sparkles, shines and provides more light than three suns. So yes, we celebrate. We are grateful for being granted such blessings. Gotcha Day is a very special day.

Don’t Miss Bonding Opportunities

POSTED AUGUST 3, 2020 

Looking for ways to bond with your kids? For me, the answer is an absolute,” yes.”

One of my daughters is a teen and the other is just about there. They no longer have that need for constant nurturing and supervision. Now they are testing and directing their own actions. This is great. Right? How else will they begin to spread their wings?

Well for me, and I’m sure some of you, this is sometimes difficult. It’s a little hurtful and exciting at the same time. The period of being so needed though, is over, and rightfully so; that stage is in the past where it should be.

Instead of being sad that I’m not the “apple of their eyes,” I want to celebrate this change. It means success. They feel independent enough to test the waters and find their way in the world. Do a happy dance, celebrate!

Okay, what do we do to stay close to our kids? I want to have a strong relationship with my daughters. I want them to feel comfortable enough with our relationship to always open up. I want them to know, no topic or problem is taboo. Over the years, I’ve learned what happens when children keep their feelings, worries and problems bottled up. I’m doing everything in my power to decrease preventable emotional pains. It’s so much happier and easier to find ways to connect instead of heal.

So, what do we do to get closer to our kids? Well, as bad as the COVID-19 pandemic is, it has also afforded me with new and interesting ways to bond with my daughters and family as a whole. Before COVID-19, I thought the family dinner time was all but gone. With extracurricular and school activities encroaching on meal time, it was a rarity to have the slow sit down time. COVID-19 has given us back, family time. For the last four months, we now enjoy more family meals, game nights and our backyard.

We spend time playing badminton, volleyball, riding bikes, scooters or having barbecues and picnics. Board games, like; Trouble, Sorry, Scrabble and Life have been retrieved from closets. I don’t want to build this up to sound more than what it is, so let me clarify the point; we are doing these things, not every night but more often than ever before.

Our latest bonding activity has taken place over the last three weeks. Now if you asked me three weeks ago if this is an activity to tout as a family bonding activity, I would have said, “no way.” You see, the activity was watching, Avatar: The Last Airbender, a series about a boys journey to save the world. I normally don’t believe “cartoons/animated adventures” provide much depth for family discussions.

Okay, so now I need to adjust my opinion of things. I was so very wrong. My older daughter persuaded me to purchase and watch the Avatar: The Last Airbender series and I’m so happy she did. Not only was this a great opportunity to spend time with both my daughters, it opened up dialogues on many topics we may never have touched on, and we bonded.

I’d have to say, the story line and the powerful characters and their growth, each in their own right, automatically stimulated our conversations. We spoke about where the story was going, the decisions the characters needed to make, family, friendship, the difference between good and evil, the things in life that sway a person to go one way or another and the option of being able to try to right our wrongs. The episodes and characters led to thought provoking conversations.

We discussed the character traits we each liked or could relate to along with character decisions we agreed and disagreed with in the episodes. I don’t think I know of another series that provided so much fodder for thought and conversation. Honestly, I’m grateful for each conversation I’ve been able to have with my daughters because of watching this series.

Go watch Avatar with your kids and see what you think. If you have no kids, watch the series on your own; it will be time well spent. Enjoy and let me know what you think. Were you able to discuss the series with your kids? Did it help you bond?

So, yes this was one of the unlikely ways I would have thought to bond, but in the end I found out it was a perfect opportunity. I must be more open and creative in my thinking so I do not miss future bonding opportunities. Do you have any thoughts on ways to bond? Let me know, I’m always interested in what else I can try.

“The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each others life.” – Richard Bach